痛苦的迹象和如何帮助

Listed below are some of the more prevalent signs of someone in distress. 此列表仅提供基本信息.

1. 抑郁症: 虽然我们都可能会时不时地感到沮丧, "normal" depressions may consist of only one or two symptoms and usually pass within days. Clinically depressed students will exhibit multiple symptoms for a longer period of time. 其中一些症状是睡眠障碍, 注意力不集中, 食欲变化, 对愉快的活动失去兴趣, 撤军, 糟糕的卫生, 丧失自尊, 以及对死亡的关注.
2. 激动或发泄: This would represent a departure from normal or socially appropriate behavior. 它可能包括具有破坏性, 不安, 或多动, 是敌对的, 增加酒精和/或药物滥用.
3. 定向障碍: 一些陷入困境的学生似乎“脱离了现实”." You may witness a diminishment in awareness of what is going on around them, 忘记或丢失东西, 误解:对事实或现实的误解, 散漫的或不连贯的讲话, 以及看起来脱离背景或奇怪的行为.
4. 吸毒和酗酒: Signs of intoxication during class or interaction with University officials are indicative of a problem that requires attention.
5. 自杀的念头: Most people who attempt suicide communicate early messages about their distress. 这些信息可以从“我不想在这里”, 到一连串模糊的“再见”, 变成“我要自杀”.非语言信息包括赠送贵重物品, 把合法的金融, 和学校事务井然有序. 以上所有的信息都应该认真对待.
6. 暴力和侵略: 你可能会意识到那些可能对他人构成危险的学生. 这可能表现为身体暴力行为, 口头威胁, 威胁电子邮件或信件, 骚扰或跟踪行为, 以及含有暴力或威胁内容的试卷或考试.

其他标志可能包括:

• 紧张、激动或易怒
• 远离他人(孤立)
• 学习成绩的突然变化
• 个人或课堂关系的突然变化
• 过分的侵略性或粗暴的行为
• 不经常上课
• 个人卫生有明显改变
• 恐惧
• 依赖性(e.g., the student who always hangs around you or constantly tries to see you)
• 困惑——包括奇怪的、令人担忧的或危险的行为

If you have decided to approach a student or if a student reaches out to you for help, 这里有一些可能有用的建议.

• 当你们都有时间并且不着急的时候和学生交谈.
• 用一种敏感的、不带威胁的方式倾听别人的想法和感受.
• Express your concern in specific nonjudgmental terms that reflect your concern for the well being of the student.
• Let the student know that you believe a consultation with a staff member at 咨询中心 could be helpful. If the student becomes defensive, simply restate your concerns and recommendations.

For various reasons, students are sometimes reluctant to see a counselor. 如果学生不愿意, taking the following steps can help to ease some of the anxiety about counseling that a person may feel.

• Assure the student that counseling is confidential and does not go on their academic record.
• Assure the student that asking for help is a sign of strength rather than weakness.
• Sometimes the student feels that his/her problem is too small to bother a counselor with. Assure the student that 辅导员 meet with students on all kinds of concerns - large and small.
• Reluctant students are relieved to know that they can meet with a counselor on a one-time basis. There may not be the need to meet with a counselor over an extended period of time or the student may choose to meet with a counselor only once. 对于那些看起来有兴趣但不愿意去咨询的学生, a helpful strategy might be to suggest that they try it one time to see how it goes.

When a student 需要马上看到, we make every effort to see them as soon as possible. Call and communicate with the receptionist that there is a student who is interested in coming for counseling and 需要马上看到. If the student makes the appointment in your presence it is important that we know the urgency and specifics of the situation. Speak with a counselor about your referral and provide the counselor with a description of the situation that has led to your concern.

而帮助别人是很重要的, 我们不能替他们做决定, 咨询应该是个人的选择. Occasionally even your best efforts to encourage a student to seek counseling will be unsuccessful. If the student resists referral and you remain uncomfortable with the situation, 联系你的系主任, 咨询中心, 和/或教务长.

While it is not expected that you be a "watchdog" or that you provide a thorough assessment, you may be the first contact for a student in distress and in a position to ask a few questions. Following these guidelines can lead to a positive outcome for all parties.

1. 安全第一! Always keep safety in mind as you interact with a distressed student. 保持一个安全的距离，如果你需要逃生路线. If danger to you or the student seems imminent, call 911 or the OU Police at (248) 370-3333.
2. 避免升级: 苦恼的学生有时很容易被激怒. 避免威胁、羞辱和恐吓的回应. It is usually not a good idea to "pull rank" and assert authority unless you are certain of the student's mental health status. Distressed students are in need of listening, validation, and support. 你可以在以后的时间提醒他们规则.
3. 问直接的问题: 采取冷静和实事求是的态度. Ask students directly if they are drunk, confused or if they have thought of harming themselves. 你不必害怕问这些问题. 你这样做不会“把想法灌输给他们”. Most distressed students are relieved to know that someone has noticed and is paying attention.
4. 不要认为你被操纵了: While it is true that some students appear distressed in order to get attention or relief from responsibility, 只有彻底的评估才能确定这一点. 寻求关注的人可能会有严重的问题，也会处于危险之中.
5. 了解自己的极限: You will be able to assist many distressed students on your own by simply listening and referring them for further help. 然而，有些学生需要的远远超过你所能提供的. Respect any feelings of discomfort you may have and focus on getting them the assistance they require. 你可以通过加强他们对你的信任来做到这一点, 接受和不评判, 试图找出问题所在, and indicating that seeking professional help is a positive and responsible thing to do that takes a lot of strength and courage.

有些迹象表明你可能过度扩张自己:

• 感到压力或被情况压垮
• 对学生感到生气
• 感到害怕
• 有“收养”或以其他方式拯救学生的想法
• “重温”你自己的类似经历